I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize