Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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