Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
