Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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