the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
