is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Randomize