if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
