This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
