Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
