SEEEEXXX PLEASE
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
