smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize