i just google imaged poop.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
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