i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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