Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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