I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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