Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Randomize
