Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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