that's an acceptable place to lick
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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