You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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