Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
