We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
