It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Green mimosas i think yes
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize