great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
A+ Viking dick
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