Just cropdusted the office
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
i've created a new STD.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Randomize
