I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
your like the ambassador to my penis.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
