So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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