I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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