Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
