I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
