Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize