Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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