Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize