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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
