NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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