dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
After tacos, we're chasing women.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
