I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Randomize
