everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Randomize