If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
