Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
