i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
