Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
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