NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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