Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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