Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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