You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
