walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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