we're blogging at a bar
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
