I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Randomize
