i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
