2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
