you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize