All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
